Grief

Grief

By Amritbir Kaur

I miss her in more ways than is imaginable. Most of the time I can't even tell but there's always a sad strain running in the background. At times I have actually felt guilty about being happy without her. She should have been here. I had a lot to share with her. She was the only one with whom I used to discuss the classic English literature including Shakespeare, Wordsworth, Francis Bacon, G.K. Chesterton, G.B. Shaw, O Henry, Guy de Maupassant et al. 

I am even more saddened when I find the sad strains in how my daughter exhibits a change of behaviour. Kids are not just kids, let's stop underestimating them. They are far more mature than a parent can ever imagine. 

This sad strain plays heavy upon my mind even more when we are joyous. I have been very fortunate with Shubham being the strong pillar of support. But we can't change time or what has happened. We both often feel her laugh ringing in her ears when she used to thoroughly enjoy the jokes that Shubham used to crack especially for her. Our evening cup of coffee was always with her for the past more than 5 years now. 

She used to always call our team a 'formidable team' and we cherish that word for ourselves. Grief doesn't pass just like that! 

I wish I could playback time, I wish ...